"Of course, one of the reasons that I
have the honor and privilege of carrying this Joyous message in this lifetime
is because of my Karmic debts from other lifetimes.
Possibly one of the reasons that you are reading
this is because I, personally, owe you a Karmic debt. Maybe I gouged out
your eyes when I was a Roman legionnaire or a Viking or something, and
now I am repaying that debt by helping you to see more clearly in this
We will probably never know for sure and we probably
do not have any need to know for sure. Past life information is available
to us only on a need-to-know basis. In other words, only if it is directly
connected to our healing process in this lifetime. Simple curiosity is
not a good enough reason to allow us to access accurate past life information.
(Of course we have our curiosity for a reason too.)
Everything happens for a reason - actually for
reasons on multiple levels. We can never know all of the reasons. We have
no need to know all of the reasons.
What we need to do is to remember that it is all
perfect somehow, some way. We need to remember that to help us stop judging
ourselves and the process.
As in the quote from Illusions, it is the depth
of our belief in tragedy and injustice that is a measure of our Spiritual
growth. "The depth of our belief" has to do with our perspective, with
how much we are buying into the reversed attitudes and false beliefs, with
how much power we are giving the illusions.
What I have found is that in many instances even
though the levels that I can see, that I am conscious of, are mostly dysfunctionalarising
out of the false beliefs and fears of the disease of Codependence - on
deeper levels there are "right on" reasons for behaviors for which I was
. . . As another, more universal example, when
I started to learn about Codependence, I used to really beat myself up
because I found that I was still looking for "her," even though I had learned
about some of the dysfunctional levels of that longing.
I had learned that as long as I thought that I
needed someone else to make me happy and whole I was setting myself up
to be a victim. I had learned that I was not a frog who needed a princess
to kiss me in order to turn into a prince - that I am a prince already,
and just need to learn to accept that state of Grace, that princeness.
I had come to understand that those levels of
my longing were dysfunctional and Codependent - and I judged and shamed
myself because I could not let go of the longing for "her."
But as my awakening progressed I realized that
there were "right on" reasons for that longing, for that "endless aching
need" that I felt.
One of those "right on" levels was that the longing
was a message concerning my very real need to attain some balance between
the masculine and feminine energy within me - which begets dysfunctional
behavior when it is projected, focused, outward as I had been taught to
do in childhood.
And on a much deeper level I came to understand
that I am - and have been, ever since polarization - looking for my twin
As I become discerning I could learn to pick the
baby out of the bathwater, that is, not judge and shame myself for longing
for "her" - and throw out the dirty bath water, that is, not take action
based on, or give power to, the dysfunctional belief that I am a frog who
cannot be happy until I find my princess.
By learning discernment we can begin to become
conscious of the reasons that are dysfunctional and based on Codependent
beliefs and fears (the dirty bathwater) so that we can change the way we
react to those levels, can stop giving them power, and we can honor that
there are "right on" levels by not shaming or judging ourselves (the baby)
even if we are not sure what those reasons are.
I am talking about FAITH here.
The more we remember that everything is unfolding
perfectly, the more we can have faith that there is a very good reason
for even what appears to be the greatest tragedy, the most profound injustice.
We need to accept and honor - that is, not shame
and judge ourselves for - not only our feelings and our past behaviors,
our human needs and desires, but also our longings, our resistance, and
We have those longings for a reason. We have those
fears and that resistance for a reason. The more we start remembering that
"the Force is with us," the easier it becomes to accept and Love ourselves.
As was stated earlier, maybe the reason you have
not done your grief work is that it has not been time yet - everything
happens perfectly. Even our procrastination, and our denial, and our avoidance
is a perfect part of our path.
We are being guided!
The more we remember that, the easier it is to
stop buying into the grandiose, ego-self, arrogant, Codependent, power
trip of believing that we have the incredible power to screw up the Great
Spirit's Plan. We do not. We never did.
One of the reasons on a very deep level, at a
soul/higher ego level, that we have resistance to doing our healing and
owning our power is because of our past life experiences.
We have all been punished for owning our power
in the past! Whether that was by being burned at the stake for being a
healer, or drawn and quartered for being a teacher, or hanged for being
a messenger, or whatever.
So we have very good reasons for not trusting
God or this life business!
We also have very good reasons for not trusting
ourselves because we have all abused the power in the past. We have had
lifetimes when we were teachers who led our students astray, when we were
healers or leaders or messengers who took the left-hand path and served
the forces of darkness instead of Light.
We have very good reasons for being terrified
of owning our power again!
Those are the reasons on the deepest level why
we have resistance to the healing process; that is why some of us have
needed the stick to get us to start awakening.
No matter what our personal stick is, whether
it is Alcoholism or love addiction or overeating or whatever, it is the
vehicle which has forced us to start awakening. It is the blessed gift
that has started our awakening to consciousness of our path.
The conditions on the planet have changed! As
long as the planet's energy field of Collective Human Emotional Consciousness
was reversed, the process of growing towards the Light attracted the dark.
That is not going to happen this time. The planet's
energy field of consciousness is now positively aligned with Truth. Growing
towards the Light now attracts more Light.
In this age, we can own who we Truly are without
feeling as if we are going to be punished for it.
Of course we never really were being punished
- it just felt like it.
What we have been doing here in human body for
all of these lifetimes is receiving the opportunity to experience every
facet of the human experience. We have all been creators and destroyers.
We have all been the oppressor and the oppressed. We have all been the
perpetrator and the victim.
No one has ever done anything to us that we have
not done to her/him in some way, at some time.
It is time to stop blaming others. It is time
to stop blaming ourselves. We chose the paths we are on in order to do
the healing and Karmic settlement that was necessary. We need to own and
honor and release the feelings at the same time that we need to stop buying
into the false beliefs."
"Doing that grieving is overwhelming terrifying and painful. It is also
the gateway to Spiritual Awakening. It leads to empowerment, freedom, and
inner peace. Releasing that grief energy allows us to start being able
to be emotionally honest in the moment in an age-appropriate way. It is,
in my understanding, the path that the Old Souls who are doing their healing
in this Age of Healing and Joy need to travel to get clearer about their
path and accomplish their mission in this lifetime."
(Column "Further Journeys to the Emotional Frontier
Within" by Robert Burney)